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As parents or educators our mission is to help little people grow up. Part of this means trying our best to help children learn and develop properly.  Of course, the development of social, emotional and cognitive skills is an essential aspect of human life. Well-developed social and emotional skills are equivalent to good mental health in early years; a symbol of the ability to form and maintain positive relationships and to experience, manage and express emotions.  So, which social and emotional skills should we nurture in our little ones?   1. Listening to others   Encouraging listening is essential for problem solving and maintaining friendships and relationships. This can also include looking others in the eyes and thinking before speaking.   2. Meeting new people   When meeting new people, it can be beneficial for children to learn how to introduce themselves, including focusing on:  Deciding whether or not a self-introduction is warranted and if they want to introduce themselves Choosing the appropriate time to introduce themselves Saying his or her name and waiting for the other to do the same (or asking for the other person’s name) Telling someone they have just met something that may help them relate to one another (similar interests) or asking appropriate questions   3. Starting and ending a conversation Young children often tend to leave conversations, games and other social interactions unfinished.  It can therefore be beneficial for children to learn the right time to start a conversation and how to do it properly. You could focus on:  how and when to start talking and how to attract others’ interest while in a group speaking in a friendly manner, asking questions and listening to responses sensing whether a conversation should end and when the right time is ending the conversation in a friendly manner   4. Following instructions Young children often have short attention spans, but for proper social and emotional development, following instructions is very important. Encourage your child to focus on:  listening to what it is told to him/her from the very beginning asking questions to clarify any queries repeating instructions to check them if necessary recognising the order of the instructions   5. Sharing Young children are also impulsive and feel the need for instant gratification. For this reason they may experience difficulties in sharing. Sharing is a learning process. Try to help your child:  to acknowledge that sharing is important to maintain a friendship to decide if they have anything to share with the others to decide a suitable moment to share and the person they want to share with understand that they should not always expect something in return   6. Understanding body language   Body language  is another key element of social interaction and transmits a lot of information. You may wish to work with your child on:  facing the person they are addressing and trying to identify the feelings he/she expresses noticing posture and body position and the feelings they are associated with   7. Working with others   The childhood equivalent of teamwork is often playing games with set rules: a starting point in social interaction. Ideally, children:  understand the rules of the game and know them before starting to play ask questions if they have doubts decide who they want to play with and who can play with them, who will begin etc. wait their turn end the game on good terms   8. Offering help Helping others is one of the best ways to make friends. Encourage your charge to:  decide if somebody needs help and if that person wants to be helped estimate what sort of help they can give and choose a suitable moment to offer it respect the other person’s decision if they don't want help   9. Using good manners   The use of manners can be a telling sign of a child’s level of social and emotional development. Help your child to:  decide if somebody did something for them and whether thanking is appropriate choose the right and the best way to thank someone and a reason if required be aware when somebody pays them a compliment, accept it and thank them evaluate others’ behavior, choose a proper way and a suitable moment to pay a compliment without waiting for something in return   10. Use of empathy This means understanding what others feel in order to be good friends. Try to help your charge to:  listen to and observe what others say and do be aware of what other people may feel understand that every behaviour has an explanation and that actions have consequences be aware of others’ feelings when they do or say something  For children to understand who they are, what emotions they are experiencing and what others expect from them can be a long process. These concepts are a base for social and emotional wellbeing and they help children develop trust in themselves, feel empathy, the ability to form meaningful and long lasting relationships with their peers, but also to value themselves and those around them.  Children learn these strategies either at home, at nursery/school or during educational activities that take place outside school through games, stories or social interactions. In Words Make Sense activities, they can learn about emotions and social skills through reading stories, poems, songs, picture reading, talks or games. These activities, based on studies in psychology and learning, are designed for young children aged 18 months - 4 years and help them socialise with others and discover their own potential so they can develop a positive self-image.   Lavinia Stupariu, Psychologist,  Creator of Words Make Sense activities www.wordsmakesense.co.uk 

In today’s interconnected world, one of the main causes for concern for many parents, nannies , governess and childcare workers is keeping their kids or charges safe when online . It is an indisputable fact that tablets, smartphones and social media are now totally integrated into the lives of parents and more and more children. It is also undeniable that we are only beginning to understand the positive and negative impacts of this new technology for children and adults alike. If fact the World Health Organisation reports that: 'Infants younger than 1 should never be in front of screens'. And kids ages 2 to 4, the international health agency said,  'should have no more than an hour each day of sedentary screen time'. In addition, recent research into cyberbullying points to a massive increase over the last decade. Instances have doubled from 2007 with: '87% of young people having experienced cyberbullying occurring online'. So let's look at some of the tools available to parents and nannies to help them ensure that the children in their care are protected, beginning with search engines.   How often do we now hear the phrase, “Just Google it”? The search engine giant has become a huge part of everyday life, with many simply searching the website name on Google rather than typing the full URL into the address bar! But how can you make sure that results that come up are child-friendly? Well - Google has its own privacy setting in SafeSearch which works well. This can be set up for each user individually. However, a much simpler child-friendly option would be to use Kiddle . The Kiddle child-friendly search algorithm is divided into 3 sections: Safe sites and pages are written specifically for kids. These are handpicked and checked by Kiddle editors. Typically, results 1-3. Safe, trusted sites that are not written specifically for kids, but have content written in a simple way and is easy for kids to understand. These are also handpicked and checked by Kiddle editors. Typically, results 4-7. Safe, famous sites that are written for adults and providing expert content, but are harder for kids to understand. These are filtered by Google safe search. Typically, results 8 onwards. The results that Kiddle returns are also posted with thumbnails to help make it easier for kids to pick the results they want to see. Overall we feel that Kiddle is an excellent, kid-friendly search engine that is well designed and safe for kids researching as part of their homework or projects online. For more of an ‘all-in-one’ solution you may wish to consider Kaspersky Online . Available for PC, Mac and most smartphones. Kaspersky provides an all-encompassing solution to help monitor your kids’ internet activity. It uses similar filters to those Kiddle integrates, whilst additionally giving you the option to monitor total screen time and app usage. The paid versions also give you information on the device’s GPS location data and social media use. We particularly like the simple and straightforward interface that Kaspersky offers the user and that fact that GPS tracking lets you know where your kids are at all times- providing excellent peace of mind. The app also alerts you when the battery on your child’s device is running low; so you can give them a quick call or message to reminding them to charge their device. This is something we know a few adults could find useful too! As general rules, if you are working as a nanny , governess or tutor it is probably also a sensible idea to write down some daily ‘best practices’ you can discuss with your charges and then implement to make keeping them safe online easier. It may also be advisable to involve the parents in this discussion, so everyone is in agreement about the internet usage plan moving forward. You can find some examples of some sensible rules for technology below: Have computers placed in a common area of the house Check your children’s browsing history regularly and make sure you know their passwords Advocate time spent together, helping with homework or simply researching topics for discussion together Set out the ground rules (such as ‘no talking to strangers online’, ‘no sharing personal information or addresses) etc. No downloading or uploading of data, photos, music etc. without permission Finally, and most importantly, speak to your children and begin an ongoing conversation about what they need to be careful about online, and any particular ‘dos and donts’.   As technology moves forward and globalisation increases human connection, of course, it remains essential to safeguard and protect those in our care; both in home-life or work-life for those working in childcare. So please let us know your thoughts! How do you make sure your charges are safe online? What works well for you? Do you use any software or applications that you can recommend? Do you speak to your charges about their online computer and social network use? Let us know in the comments below!

Are you trying to decide between a Nanny or an Aupair ? Or do you think they are the same thing? The terms nanny and au pair are often used interchangeably however there are several differences between the two and it's worth taking a moment to differentiate.   The Au Pair   An au pair is usually between the ages of 18 and 24 and will typically come from overseas in the form of a cultural exchange. They live with a family for a temporary period with the aim of learning a new language and immersing themselves in a foreign culture.    With an average age of 20, au pairs are unlikely to have had any formal training in childcare and usually have only minor experience – perhaps in babysitting or minding younger relatives. Indeed, they are unlikely to be pursuing a permanent career in childcare. As such, you should allow an au pair a little time to get up to speed with their duties.   Au pairs will settle into the host family as a temporary family member and will be paid pocket money to allow them to explore their host country. The time they are performing their duties will be shorter and more flexible to allow them to attend college. Those duties will be centred on looking after children and light domestic duties such as hoovering, tidying up and cooking meals. An Au Pair should not be expected to work more than 20-24 hours in a week and should never be left with sole care of under 2s. They can be expected to play with the children, babysit and possibly supervise homework – but Au Pairs are not trained in education, so it wouldn’t be typical for them to engage the children in learning or structured activities.    The Nanny   Credentialed and experienced, a Nanny offers a much broader service in childcare. They will know how to communicate with schools, day care centres, doctors, etc. Most nannies are confident cooking healthy meals for the children, will not only supervise homework but support it with their own knowledge and teaching techniques and will frequently engage the children in creative , educational activities . They are more independent, need far less supervision and can live at or away from the premises.    A professional nanny is committed to their chosen vocation, whilst they will enjoy their own lives outside of their working hours, they are not in the country for a cultural exchange or learning experience. Having plenty of experience, and in some cases even formal training , a Nanny is more likely to be able to cope with those little emergencies that crop up from time to time. You will enjoy more peace of mind leaving an older, wiser head in charge of your children.   Of course, higher professionalism comes at a price. Nannies wages start at £400 net per week for live-in, UK based roles . This increases substantially for international roles, where the average British Nanny will enjoy a salary of at least £800npw, rising up to £1500npw. They will be subject to employment law, including taxes and statutory contributions in the country of employment.  As an employer, you may be subject to paying pension contributions too, as well as supplying a payslip. Nannies will be entitled to holiday pay and will work a statutory number of working hours per week.   Conclusion   The differences between a nanny and an au pair are largely cultural. An au pair is typically a young language student from overseas. The employment is more casual, the au pair embedding into the host family on a temporary basis. It can be a working contract mutually beneficial to both parties, not least because of the ease of availability and low cost. With a nanny you get the reassurance of training, experience and professionalism; but expect to pay a little more.   Jennifer Heald is Managing Director of Diamond Private Staff, an elite staffing agency placing domestic staff all over the world.  www.diamondprivatestaff.com